Thursday, February 22, 2018
February 22, 2018 | 0 Comment(s)
Masa umur belasan tahun dulu, I always have a thought that by 20, I met the right guy, who swipe away all of cinta monyet, and I believed by 25 I would already married. But as life always comes with surprise and turnarounds, takdir tak membawa aku kepada jalan cerita yang aku create sewaktu aku remaja.
After my first big love relationship ended, I just stay still, not make a move to be in a relationship again. Because the feeling being hurt is still there. Tapi, aku tak nafikan, berada dalam hubungan mengajar aku banyak perkara. It's more than just going on dates. It's an experience. Hubungan yang lepas dah buat aku matang, ajar aku tolak ansur (paling failed bab ni). Sebenarnya, untuk sesuatu hubungan yang tak berhasil tu, kita tahu mesti ada kekurangan baik di pihak dia ataupun di pihak kita. So it's a point to learn more about myself, and how to settle it.
Now I think, I'm only 25. I have still much more to do, much more to see, much more to explore, much more to learn. So why should I be looking for a man to marry now? Of course setiap orang tak sama. Ada yang lagi muda but ten times more mature than me and dah ada jodoh untuk kahwin, so yahhh kahwin lah anda.
For me, 25 is still young to know wether or not I could spend the rest of my life with one person. Orang kata perkahwinan tu satu perjudian yang kita tak tahu berjaya atau tidak, so for me, it's still early to step my foot dalam alam rumahtangga ni. Of course, I want to get married in the future, having a family, being a wonderful wife and supermom. And who knows, maybe my soulmate will show up tomorrow.
I'm not saying that I'm against being in a relationship, I'm not saying that everyone should stay single, but I would rather wait than to rush it. I just want to enjoy some time on my own first. I want to be my best self before I found "the one".
For now, I should work on myself, for myself and by myself. And I'm okay with that.